I can’t believe it’s been a year since I didn’t become a better person.
– Area Man

The definition of insanity is doing the same old crap for New Years and missing this party.
– Albert Einstein

Youth is when you’re allowed to stay up late on New Year’s Eve. Middle age is when you’re forced to.
– Bill Vaughan

Recent studies indicate that you have a 9 out of 10 chance of getting TURNT at this party!

This party sounds really fuckin cool.
– Dave Chappelle

I love overpaying for dull fancy New Years parties downtown.
– Nobody Ever

It gets late early out here.
– Yogi Berra

A New Year’s resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other.

“Out with the old, in with the new” is a fitting expression for a holiday that is based on vomiting.
– Andy Borowitz

He who breaks a resolution is a weakling; He who makes one is a fool.
– F.M. Knowles

The biggest New Years Party in the entire Elm Grove metro area.
– Elm Groove

It wouldn’t be New Year’s if I didn’t have regrets.
– William Thomas

I’ve been waiting for this for 43 years.
– Irma Childress